“One day when I was
very young, I was going somewhere outside wearing frock, my mother stopped me
and said that you are a boy and you shouldn’t be wearing these clothes. They
are supposed to be worn by girls”
The session on ‘physical
changes during adolescence’ with the participants of Government School, Dwarka
began with Ungli Dance. The participants enjoyed it so much that almost
everyone wanted to volunteer to do the energizer! After a brief introduction on
what is about to happen for next 2 hours, the participants were divided into
groups and were invited to discuss on ‘when did they first come to know whether
they are boy or a girl?’
‘I came to know that I am
a boy because of my private parts. It didn’t really made any difference’
‘My neighbors used to
call me Raju, because of the name I came to know that I am a boy. I felt very
happy because I am a boy’
‘I was wearing clothes
that girls wear. My aunt laughed at my face and taunted me that are you a girl
that you are wearing this?’
‘Because of the body
changes that I am having and also because my friends said do. It hardly matters’
‘My father addresses me
as beta – a connotation used for boys, that’s how I came to know that I am a
boy. I couldn’t really understand because sometimes he uses some nicknames and
sometimes he calls me beta’
Most of the
participants were either very happy to say it out aloud that they are boy or shrugged
that it didn’t really matter. On asking about their reaction, the simple answer
was ‘boys can do whatever they feel like, we don’t have to ask, can roam around
and fun. No one stops them and they are strong so it’s cool to be a boy’
In the body map
activity, the participants were grouped into 6 where they were asked to
construct body diagram with all the body parts drawn and discuss questions
regarding physical changes –
Good things about
growing up-
We grow in height,
voice changes, chest broadens, we become more smart
We grow beard and
mustache that makes us look manly and handsome.
Bad things about
growing up-
Hairs grow all over the
body, pimples on the face
Hairs on penis, itching
and boils
Thoughts like what if
my penis doesn’t grow or it remain small hover into our minds
Challenges we face
during puberty-
We develop negative
thoughts, we engage in all sort of bad things, and act on it too
We get into trouble,
make comments on girls and harass them. Even if some of us doesn’t want to but
we can’t really stop them.
We have to get married,
I don’t wanna get married because I don’t want to take responsibilities.
Post this discussion,
with the help of chart paper we engaged on what is adolescence, what are the
different physical changes that happen in girls and boys, how these changes
affect us and why it is important to have conversations on the same.
It was weird that they
knew the name of the private parts of both girls and boys through the verbal
abuses they use frequently and not the actual names. For few moments, there was
dead silence because for the participants the use of these names is for abuses
and have no other relevance. They were shocked to say the least but once the
idea that talking about private parts is as okay as talking about other parts
of the body, they seem to understand. This makes me wonder how it is easier in
our society to let young and old men use verbal abuses that comprises of
private parts or abuse of them but the moment you talk about them with respect
to body- you come under the radar of morality and right or wrong! This duplicity
of behavior and mindset is what leading our young children to the path of
violence or acceptance of the same as normal behavior. This needs to change and
the change has to begin at very early age for constructing a society that aims
for gender equity and respect.
No comments:
Post a Comment