“I had my first periods
on Sunday; I wasn’t feeling really good in spite of the fact that Sunday has
always been my favorite day! My sister was the first one who told me that I am
having periods. I was so scared and confused; the thoughts of having periods
every week were haunting me. Even now when my periods are delayed I get scared.
It is always so uncomfortable”
The primary objective
of engaging with adolescent girls on this day was to build an understanding on ‘what
periods are?’, importance of hygiene during periods, taboos and myths around
menstruation in order to empower them to challenge the shame and stigma around
it. The session began with an inquiry as to why we have gathered here today –
the answers were quite interesting – to talk about puberty, adolescence,
physical changes, learning a new skill or may be attraction? When I shared the
topic and objective behind the session, there was an instant murmuring, shy smiles
and some of them started looking at each other except in the front where I was
standing! This is not unusual thing to happen as it indicates the discomfort
and shame around periods in our society which is evident even at the beginning of
adolescence.
The participants were
then invited to write ‘their experience of having periods for the first time’.
It was quite interesting to see that there was pin drop silence with only faint
voices of pen and ruffling of papers being audible. The heaviness of 100+
experiences of first periods weighed on me as they had mentioned how they
actually felt during the first time which was not pleasant even for one person.
They were scared, uncomfortable, upset and full of confusion as to what is
happening to them suddenly- most of them had cried, screamed, hid from their
parents, didn’t go to school and were worried that they have caught some
unknown disease that might be fatal. The important aspect was they still don’t
feel okay with it!
One of the most interesting
parts of this activity was when I was collecting back the sheets- few of the
girls handed me folded sheets which indicated the importance and dire need to
have these conversations.
On asking how they felt
after writing this was a catch –
‘I feel really good.
This is like unburdening because no one has ever asked me.’
‘I am so surprised and
had never thought someone would ask me to write about periods as even my mom
acts weird while giving me pad’
‘I am so glad that we
got this thing written, it was indeed a painful experience. I still feel scared
when I don’t get periods’
‘I am so amazed that
all of us could write it. I could write because we are all girls and I didn’t feel
ashamed for the first time about my periods’
Based on the above
discussion, we detailed out what periods are? Why a girl in puberty gets periods
and how it is important? The conversation on periods started from physical to
emotional to societal aspect of it building an understanding that all girls
during adolescence gets periods, there is nothing wrong in you and in fact it
is important to have them for your proper growth as reproductive being; emphasizing
that it is perfectly okay to feel scared, weird or confused about them; it is
also normal to talk about it because periods are not an hindrance to you as a person.
Following this, we did
a mind map on ‘the things girls are told not to do while being on periods’. The
answers included- don’t worship during periods, don’t go to temple, not attend
festivities/puja, don’t enter kitchen or cook food, don’t touch pickles, don’t
engage in physical activities and whole lot of things that we are not supposed
to eat during menstruation. This discussion left us with only luke warm water
and milk that could be consumed during periods. Because of this weird revelation,
everyone started laughing with screams like 'wah we can't have anything just
because we are having periods that sounds so stupid'
We then divulged into
whether these are true or have any logic behind them? With our discussion,
every point became null and void leading to the basic fact that periods is a
physical change that happens to girls and all these myths/taboos arises because
we never discuss about periods openly and blindly follow what is told to us!
In order to gather
their understanding on periods, the participants were invited to discuss or
perform a role play on the given situation to the respective groups.
Through the role play,
the first group challenged the most common and strictly followed taboo that
girls shouldn’t pray or indulge in pooja while being on periods.
In the second play, the
participants created a play where they challenged the myth that girls shouldn’t
engage in physical activities during menstruation. In this, the participants
actually shared how their sports teacher (Male) talk about what periods are and
how they shouldn’t stop girls from playing sports even if they are having
periods.
The third play was my
favorite and I would remember this for long time. We were running out of time,
the girls in the third group were reluctant so one of the girls stood out and
said that she would perform all by herself. It was enthralling and enticing to
see her confidence where she played numerous characters while weaving the story
that challenges the taboo that period talk shouldn’t happen between boys and
girls. In this play, the boy offers support to the girl who gets periods in
public transport. This openness around
one of the most tabooed topic of periods within 2 hours of conversation was an
experience in itself. The girls were bubbling with questions and ideas how to
share their thoughts on periods by the end of the session.
The joy, calmness and
comfort replaced the fear, discomfort and confusion the girls were experiencing
before the session which just made me happy and opened the doors for more such
conversations.
