When adolescents engaged in conversations and explored the question of ‘Who am I?”

“I was told constantly by my friends and others that I won’t be able to swim, I can’t swim! Then I learnt swimming- that is the craziest thing that I have done”

‘Gender, sexuality and reproductive health’ intervention with the second set of adolescent boys began with the session ‘Who am I?’ These participants were very different from the previous batch; there was this positive chirpy energy that is inviting and interesting to engage with, though they were naughty with constant murmurs and giggles!

The participants were quite enthusiastic on sharing around the question of ‘the craziest thing you have done’ –

“Mujhe kabutarbaazi ka bahut sauk hai”

“I love playing badminton and doing different exercise”

“I love watching WWE and doing stunts”

“Once few boys who were elder to me, came to threaten me- they thought that they could easily beat me as I am shorter than them but I put up a brave fight. Instead of them harming me in any way, I beat them”

The participants had flair of dramatics which was very entertaining-

“While I was in village, I sneaked out to swim in the river. Somehow my mother came to know about it and she got really angry. She literally put my head in the water and scolded me for sneaking out.”

The participants differed from each other in terms of physical body especially height – so it was quite a shocker when many of them shared that they have bunked, they ride bike, dived into deep waters, engaged in fights and loved doing stunts.

There was pin drop silence while they filled pre-assessment forms with occasional murmuring, giggles and queries. This just reflected on how good the questions are as they could actually capture what the participants were feeling and what thoughts were running in their minds.

“I felt very weird writing answers! I didn’t know many but I guess I have seen sanitary pad in the movie in which Akshay kumar acted.”

“Does peer pressure means the pressure that we go through waiting for results? As in if I fail, I feel like committing suicide”

“One of the boy in my colony committed suicide because he felt pressured because of his friends”

This was followed by the activity where the participants were invited to create their own identity maps – here they were supposed to write the words or things that they associate with themselves which could be their dreams, aspirations, likes, dislikes and others! It was impressive and undeniably inspiring to see young hearts dream so big irrespective of the conditions.

“I want to be an astronaut.”

“I want to be a scientist and invent interesting things”

“I love singing and listening to new songs”

“I like girls”

In the next part of the activity, the participants were needed to stand beside the person with whom they share one or more things in the identity maps. It happened for the first time that 7 people couldn’t find a partner with even one similarity.

One of the participants shared, “I felt good that we love singing. I didn’t know that we have this in common. We can pair up, sing together and learn music.”

Another participant shared, “I am disappointed that I couldn’t find a person who share something common with me”

There was this one pair who instead of sharing identity maps with each other were arguing with each other. On asking what happened? Both of them were taunting each other for their body size by calling fat and haddi! They were pacified by explaining how people differ from each other in many ways – one of them being body shape and size and this shouldn’t be the basis of taunting/teasing or argument. In all these conversations, issues of peer pressure, body image and bullying came out with dominance – which just emphasized the need of our curriculum.

In the next part of the session, it was explained how our identity changes over the course of life. In order to understand how values that we acquire during adolescence shape our future selves, story of a girl was shared. The participants were listening so intently that the facilitator actually felt heard, all the eyes were directed towards and responses reflected how thoughtful adolescents are.

‘She always spoke truth no matter what were the conditions’

‘She was hardworking, faced discrimination and rarely had good friends’

‘She wasn’t scared, she is so strong and she never changed for anyone!’

On asking what is that one value they would acquire or hold to themselves –

“I will focus more on my studies”

“No matter who says what, I will never leave music. I will keep practicing and become master in it.”

On hearing this, suddenly lot of other participants started murmuring and one of the said, “he was scolded by the teacher for not singing properly. Sir also slapped him”

The participant responded, “I know, that’s why I said, no matter how many difficulties I face, I would never give up on music”

In the last activity, the participants were invited to write the positive attribute they see in themselves.

“I was going to the tuition when I saw an old woman trying to cross the road. She had lots of things in her hand. I picked up her stuff and accompanied her till home. Her relatives appraised me for being helpful.”

“I am appreciated many times especially when I clean my house”

“I played banjo, my teacher was very happy hearing it.”

Few of the participants were asked to share the positive attributes they have enlisted for their selves. I was amazed the conviction with which they shared their qualities – when one of them said leader – it felt like yes he is leader! So they shared attributes with so much confidence that it seemed that these qualities are made for them.

Post workshop, few of the participants gathered and asked questions like ‘What are condoms?” “What are periods?” So with these pre assessment forms, unknowingly this curiosity has been facilitated and we could actually see them anticipating as to what would happen in the next session!